In a move that has left Hollywood stunned and social media ablaze, Ellen DeGeneres and Whoopi Goldberg have officially announced their decision to leave the United States and relocate to England. The comedic icons and longtime advocates for social justice cited their dissatisfaction with the state of the nation following Donald Trump’s reelection as the primary reason for their departure.

“This isn’t the America we fought for, laughed for, or cried for,” Ellen said in a tearful Instagram post. “We’ve done everything we can, but it’s time to move on.”

Whoopi, speaking from Heathrow Airport, added, “I’ve spent years trying to wake people up. But now? Now I need some sleep—and I’m not going to find it in America.”

The announcement came via a surprise joint video on Instagram, where Ellen and Whoopi were seen sitting in a British tea shop, sipping Earl Grey and munching on scones. “It’s bittersweet,” Ellen admitted, “but this is where we need to be right now. England feels like the home America used to be.”

Whoopi nodded in agreement. “At least here, the politicians are upfront about being a mess. No gaslighting, just bad wigs and cricket metaphors.”

The pair also shared that they have purchased homes in a picturesque English village outside London. Ellen’s new property reportedly comes with a sprawling garden perfect for hosting tea parties, while Whoopi’s has an art studio and a reading nook overlooking the countryside.

The announcement sent shockwaves through Hollywood, with stars and fans alike expressing their disbelief and heartbreak. “Ellen and Whoopi leaving? This feels like losing Mount Rushmore,” tweeted actress Reese Witherspoon.

Steven Spielberg, a close friend of both women, called their decision a “wake-up call.” “If Ellen and Whoopi can’t see a future in America, what does that say about where we are as a nation?”

Even Oprah Winfrey chimed in, posting a heartfelt message: “I’ll miss you both, but I understand. Sometimes, the heart needs space to heal.”

Not one to miss an opportunity to take a jab, Donald Trump addressed the departure during a rally in Texas. “Ellen and Whoopi? Overrated!” Trump declared. “They think they’re too good for America? Good! England can have them. But let me tell you, they’ll be begging to come back when they see how much tea costs over there.”

He added, “Frankly, I never liked their shows. Too much talk, not enough winning.”

The news also sparked a fierce debate among fans. The duo’s supporters lauded their courage to leave and start anew, using hashtags like #EllenAndWhoopiForever and #NotMyAmerica.

“I don’t blame them,” one fan posted on Twitter. “They’ve given so much to this country. If they need to leave for their sanity, we should respect that.”

Critics, however, accused the pair of abandoning their platform. “Running away isn’t activism,” one detractor tweeted. “It’s a cop-out.”

Despite the mixed reactions, Ellen and Whoopi appear to be embracing their new lives abroad. The two have already been spotted exploring London landmarks and attending a charity cricket match, where Ellen reportedly joked, “I still don’t understand this game, but at least nobody’s wearing a red hat.”

Ellen has hinted at launching a new British talk show tentatively titled Afternoon Tea with Ellen, while Whoopi is said to be considering a book about her experiences navigating America’s political landscape.

“This isn’t retirement,” Whoopi clarified. “It’s a sabbatical from the madness.”

The departure of two of America’s most beloved figures has left many pondering its deeper meaning. For decades, Ellen and Whoopi have been cultural touchstones, using their platforms to promote compassion, equality, and humor. Their exit feels like more than just a relocation—it’s a statement.

“They didn’t just leave the country,” said cultural critic Linda Marks. “They left a legacy of hope and laughter. And their absence will be felt deeply.”

When asked if they might come back, Ellen and Whoopi were noncommittal. “Never say never,” Ellen said. “But right now, America feels like a party where everyone’s arguing and nobody’s dancing. England feels like a place where we can breathe.”

Whoopi, however, was more direct. “If y’all figure it out, give us a call. Until then, we’ll be over here enjoying the quiet.”

As Ellen and Whoopi settle into their new lives, America is left to grapple with the implications of their departure. For some, it’s a sobering reminder of the country’s deep divisions. For others, it’s a call to action.

But one thing is certain: wherever they go, Ellen and Whoopi will continue to inspire. As Ellen put it in her parting message, “Keep laughing, America. Keep dancing. And don’t forget—kindness always wins.”

NOTE: This is SATIRE, It’s Not True.